America, Britain

From Faster Than the Speed of Light (2003) by João Magueijo:

Regrettably, people are often most proud of their most appalling attributes, and indeed many American scientists appear to be more appreciative of bandwagons than of their Feynman legacy. I once met a girl in New York who was thrilled to find out I was a physicist; but she became terminally disappointed upon hearing that I lived in England and harbored no ambitions to move to the United States. She simply couldn’t understand that. When I asked why, she tried to reply with an example, but she couldn’t remember the name of the physicist in point. She asked me, “Who was the physicist who was better than Einstein, but never came to the U.S. so he never made it?”

work is overrated

From New Rules For Writers by Anis Shivani:

Find ways to be unemployed, doing nothing, finding enough time on your hands, after you’ve met your basic needs, to wander into unknown realms of thought and imagination. You can’t do it when you’re busy working like everyone else, collecting a paycheck, keeping regular hours, depending on the goodwill and collegiality of customers, coworkers, bosses — if you choose employment in academia, it’s no different, you still have clients and bosses to please. Avoid this gentle poison by figuring out ways you can mock the system by taking from it what it needs to give you to maintain your writing, and give it nothing back in return.

you start to think it’s normal

From The Time I Heard the Private Donald J. Rankin String Concerto with One Discordant Violin, by the American Composer John Morton by Yann Martel:

I hate this place. I hate it because whenever I come here during the day I like it and nearly fall for it. It’s comfortable and warm, the people are nice, and you know what’s expected of you. I say to myself, You should get a daytime job here. The pay’s good, better than what you make now anyway, you work with people, the hours are sane — hey, why not?

scientists and bureaucrats

From the book The Art of James Christensen: Journey of the Imagination; captions by the author.

Three Scientists Debating the Aerodynamic Capabilities of the Dynastes Beetle

The beetle flies for two miles at a stretch, but these self-important egos are debating it “scientifically”. You may notice that their feet don’t match up and it’s very hard to tell where one leaves off and another begins. They have, in effect, lost their personal identities in their quest for self-importance.

The Old Scholar

Every university has an old scholar or two, professors whose learning stopped years ago, here symbolized by the wormy apple and the snuffed-out candle. The tatty, stuffed owl on wheels, the Ptolemaic (earth-centered) solar system, and the Leonardian sketch that’s all out of kilter symbolize wisdom that has become outdated or obsolete.

Life-Size Portrait of a Very Minor Official

I have an ongoing battle with the rigidity of bureaucracy. This is an officious little minor dignitary. If we use hieratic scaling — that is, the most important person in an image is the largest — then this tiny little portrait is life-sized.

the science of snowballing

Continuing with the Arctic exploration theme: a scene from hilarious Belgian animation Panique au village (see the trailer). The three mad scientists, operating a giant mechanical penguin and entertaining themselves with long-distance snowballing. Where do they hire for jobs like that?

from annals of adult psychophysics

Now about the scientific expeditions — in words of a certain Humbert Humbert:

One of my favourite doctors, a charming cynical chap with a little brown beard, had a brother, and this brother was about to lead an expedition into arctic Canada. I was attached to it as a ‘recorder of psychic reactions’.

a general disinclination to work of any kind

From Three Men in a Boat by Jerome K. Jerome:

In the present instance, going back to the liver-pill circular, I had the symptoms, beyond all mistake, the chief among them being “a general disinclination to work of any kind.”

actually working

My favourite quotes from the Work section of The Lazy Person’s Guide to Life by Gray Joliffe, a truly wonderful book which seems to be out of print. If I ever get back to regular employment, I have to make sure that I can reach my full lazy person’s potential there.

actually working

Some people like making work complicated because it gives them a sense of identity and importance. Those of use who are secure enough not to need this reassurance attempt to simplify everything, and get through it quicker.

The easiest thing to be at work is the boss, because then you can delegate everything and concentrate on important things like lunch and going home early.

business travel

After all, that amount of iron isn’t entitled to fly.

commuting

The lazy person’s philosophy is this: as most of us work with our brains it is ludicrous to transport our bodies from one place to another, home to office.

getting fired

Getting fired is harmful to the self-esteem, but only for the first five or six times, after which you give up on yourself and make your fortune painting abstracts under an assumed name.

meetings

Meetings are for the most part unnecessary, but if you are dragged into one, you can catnap surreptitiously and that beats working. Don’t let key people see your eyes snap shut, though, because it looks amateur.

self-employment

Lazy people are never unemployed, as they prefer to call it freelance or self-employed.

For more quotes, go here.

budget cuts vs Nobel prizes

Science is Vital has got its official website and a bunch of celebrity supporters, including Sir Patrick Moore and the Nobel laureate Sir Paul Nurse. More than 30,700 have signed the Petition to be delivered to Downing Street this coming Thursday. (You still have a few hours to sign it!) Who knows, this time it may work.

science is vital

Britannia used to rule the world but does not any longer. It doesn’t have much in terms of natural resources, the public transport is awful and more or less everything here is overpriced. Which is understandable, since this country produces very little. London may host the next Olympics but a great sports nation Britain is not. And don’t even start me on weather.

Let’s face it, the only two things Britain is any good at are science and gardening.